urghggh

I wish

I wish I could write you a million lines,
each one ageless and priceless throughout time,
I wish I could give you the stars in the sky,
because the sun's far too lonely to give to my love

I wish I could move us far far away
and I would be true to you to the end of my days,
I wish I was sweet and loving and kind,
not bitter and callous and falling behind

For I am something rotten inside,
I'm sure of a virus, my sickness of mind,
I am angry and sharp and quick to judge,
I will break you and fuck you and sell all the parts

Its selfish for me to hold you so close,
or really is it you who's holding the noose?
This distance between us is a cavern in this bed,
you're fighting and snarling alone in your head.

I see the end, it's evenly matched,
you'll break me and I'll destroy you in a world ending crash,
more poisonous and dangerous and difficult to love,
treading water to keep your head above
you'll be broken and bitter,
I'll be sick still,
the voice in my head saying
"that went well"

So I what I really wish is that we'd never met,
To take back this energy I've spent,
But now we have, please stay close,
I'll give you the world of a strange little girl,
Just put your hand in mine, and we'll run blind,
Leaving the promise of our collision a million miles behind.

Uhh.

The music in my veins is fading,

like a slow steady thrumming running out of my veins.

Sweetheart tell me, is it my head or my heart that's out of time?

Please count the rhythm for me, please be my metronome.

Please be my metronome, please be mine.

- This seems to be all that I can write for now, that is half decent. In the meantime, enjoy a pissed off poem below, that is pure rubbish.

There are icicles in my heart,

I am cold and dark and cruel,

I am pushing against a wall that seems to never move,

Break it down and it'll break you

Find me on the edge of the knife

I am the grazed, shaking fingers scrabbling through the dirt

There are icicles in my heart,

Fight me on the ocean deep

I am a million tonnes of pressure on your chest,

The wall you push against that never seems to move

Breathe me under greying skies

I am the chlorine gas filling the chamber,

I am the poison that festers in your soul

For I am everything you wish you'd be,

Break me down and I will break you.